The Lonely Hearts Club FAQs

Q: What is The Lonely Hearts Club?
A: A monthly printed personals paper for those who still believe in the power of words and the romance of ink. Every ad is anonymous, text-only, and replied to through physical mail using a unique reply code. No swipes, no screens. Just language, longing, and the good old Royal Mail.

Q: How do I place an ad?
A: Submit your ad through our online form (max 40 words). Your ad appears in print and online for one month. Keep it elegant, understated, or delightfully eccentric, the voice is yours. Each ad is reviewed for tone, clarity, and kindness before publication.

Q: What if my ad needs editing or I change my mind?
A: You can request small edits before print. After that, ink is forever (but we’ll do our best to help).

Q: Can I stay anonymous?
A: Always. No names, no photos, no digital trail. Just words and a reply code. Interested readers send letters to us, and we forward them to you by Royal Mail every week for a month.

Q: How many ads per issue?
A: Just 285. Once they’re gone, they’re gone. A small number by design, because connection should feel rare.

Q: Who owns my ad?
A: You do. We simply hold a non-exclusive license to print, publish, and occasionally reprint your ad in future collections, anthologies, or exhibitions.

Q: How long does my ad run?
A: Each ad runs for one month, with replies forwarded weekly. If letters arrive after your month ends, we’ll contact you to see if you’d like to keep receiving them. There’s a small £5 admin fee plus postage for late forwarding.

Q: Can I repost my ad?
A: If you didn’t get the response you hoped for, we’d suggest writing a fresh ad rather than reposting. New words spark new connections. If we do accept a repeat, the standard fee still applies.

Q: Who can place an ad?
A: Anyone aged 18 to 99 (and beyond). All genders, sexualities, and stories are welcome. The only rule is respect. Members aged 100+ are automatically welcomed into The Hundred Club and may post for free, forever.

Q: What kind of ads do you accept?
A: Romantic, platonic, curious, or beautifully strange. Philosophical musings, small confessions, or grand declarations. All are welcome, so long as they’re genuine and kind. We don’t print anything hateful, explicit, or commercial.

Q: I want to reply to an ad. How does it work?
A: Simple. Note the unique code at the end of the ad, write your reply by hand, and post it to us. We forward it to the advertiser by Royal Mail every week. Replies remain sealed, sacred, and handled with care.

Q: Can I include anything in my reply?
A: Letters only, please. No gifts, cash, or surprises. Include a return address or PO box if you’d like a letter back. The charm is in the words.

Q: Can I get a refund?
A:We can’t offer refunds once an ad has been booked or printed, as space is limited and each issue is curated by hand. If there’s an error or delay caused by us, we’ll fix it or reprint at no cost. We believe in fairness, not fine print.

Q: Can I advertise my business or event?
A: Yes. We print a select number of small business or cultural ads per issue (max 20 words each). Think bookshops, record labels, vintage dealers, cafés, or galleries — anything that fits our world.

Q: Can I read the paper without placing an ad?
A: Of course. Free copies are available at select independent venues in London. It’s for readers, romantics, voyeurs, and anyone who loves language and the smell of ink. Buy a single issue for £10, or join us for the year at £100 and have each issue delivered to your door.

Q: Privacy and data?
A: We respect your privacy absolutely. No personal details are shared, stored beyond necessity, or sold. Read our full Privacy Policy for details.

Q: What makes The Lonely Hearts Club different from dating apps?
A: Everything. It’s slow, deliberate, and charmingly human. You’re writing for someone who might read your words on the train, in bed, or at a café. You have to put the effort in and show you really care.

Q: Can I keep my replies?
A: Absolutely. They’re yours to keep, love letters, curiosities, and all. We suggest archiving them in a shoebox for future historians (or heartbreak).

Q: How can I carry The Lonely Hearts Club in my shop or venue?
A: Lovely of you to ask. Email us at hello@thelonelyheartsclub.co.uk with your shop name and location and we’ll be in touch.